Thoughts on the Future

Today is another Amtrak day for me, and I was planning on writing the newest blog post today. It’s so much easier to write when not having to constantly stop to break up fights between warring children. My plan was to tell you about Amberly and Lea’s November school projects. I started outlining the post in my head and couldn’t proceed. It felt hollow and completely unimportant in the wake of the election and it’s fallout this week.

I’m having a difficult time knowing what to write, mostly because I’m still processing. I went from incredulous to dismayed, scared, angry, and resigned throughout the course of the week. The most difficult part of this, for me, was trying to process while still being reassuring to the kids. I tried to console Amberly, two states away. She was distraught and fearful for her future. Joey was just confused that the “big orange monster” was actually going to be the president. I’ve done my best to assure them that things will be okay; the make-up of this country has not suddenly changed overnight. Inside, I’m feeling not so sure. I’m a worrier by nature, and the thought of a Trump presidency is terrifying. I worry about things on a national, global, and yes, personal level. I worry about food security, personal security, access to health care, and the freedoms we take for granted every day.

I feel incredibly sad right now. I’m sad watching the news, I’m sad reading my FB newsfeed, I’m sad talking to my kids, and I’m sad seeing how sad other people are in my faith community. It feels as though we have moved beyond rational thought and appropriate discourse in this country. There’s so much hysteria on both sides of the political aisle that there is no chance for compromise because we can’t even agree on the facts of an argument. This isn’t new, but this election has made it so, so much worse. We are an arrogant nation, and if we don’t change, our arrogance will be our downfall.

On a large scale, there’s not much a I can do. I am a tiny voice in an ocean of voices. I will do what I can, though, to make the lives I touch better. I am stepping back away from social media, news sites, political commentary, etc. It makes me angry and bitter, and those emotions are not conducive to healing. I will instead invest my time in nurturing relationships I have and building new ones. I will work ever harder to teach my children love and compassion. I will take up social justice projects where the opportunities arise. I will read literature and listen to music that touches my soul. I will learn alternative medicine techniques and work to heal my body and mind. Mostly, I will love and accept love, and try to focus on the blessings I have right now.